Long Story Short (Port Melbourne) 8/10

Hi howdy hello fellow café lovers! 


Welcome back to Cards and Cafés! I came across Long Story Short after finding a photo of their Tim Tam pancakes on instagram and, after seeing this photo, I knew that it was a café I needed to visit. All the photos on their Instagram page looked delicious, so my friend Beth and I decided to visit Long Story Short for one of our weekly breakfast catch-ups. We hadn’t been to a café in Port Melbourne before and we both thought that Long Story Short would be the perfect one.

Long Story Short was pretty easy to find, as it sits at the top of Bay Street and is just a few minutes away from the Spirit of Tasmania ferry. Parking wasn’t too difficult, as there are number of places along Bay Street and along the side street near the café. Just keep in mind that these parking spots are in either a one-hour or two-hour time zone, so make sure you keep an eye on the time, otherwise you might end up with a fine.

They do not do split bills


Long Story Short has quite a large (all day) menu. With 23 mouth-watering meals to choose from, you’re bound to find something that you’ll enjoy. I personally loved how the menus looked. I really liked the black background and the white writing, with pops of colour around the border.

Long Story Short also has a great selection of wines and cocktails to choose from, as well as the traditional smoothies and coffeess.

The following menu photos were taken at the start of November 2016 and might have changed since then.

Long Story Short’s Menu (November 2016)
Long Story Short’s Drinks Menu (November 2016)

I ordered a latte, which came quite quickly to the table. The coffee itself wasn’t overly hot, which made it slightly less enjoyable. But I thought that it had a fantastic flavour and a rich and creamy consistency.

Coffee rating: 3/5  3 out of 5

Latte ($4)

Beth ordered a chai latte. There was a bit too much cinnamon for her personal taste, and she thought that the latte itself was slightly weak. However it was quite hot, which was perfect for that chilly Melbourne morning.

Chai rating: 3/5   3 out of 5

Chai latte ($5)

Beth ordered the Five-Grain Porridge, with toasted coconut flakes, lychee and mango combo, blueberries, acai, cacao nibs and almond milk.

When it arrived at the table, we both thought that the porridge was plated beautifully. Let’s be honest, it is difficult to make porridge look good, but the chef managed to do it. The bright pops of colour from the flowers against the orange of the mango and the white of the porridge looked fantastic.

Beth said that the mango and lychee worked really well together and helped to add and incredible depth of flavour to the porridge, which in many cases can usually be pretty bland. She thought that the nibs of cacao were delicious and something quite different.

The porridge itself was tasty, with a rich and creamy consistency. She was glad that it was made out of almond milk, as she thought that regular milk would have made the dish too rich.

She was just disappointed with the size. It was slightly too small for her liking and she was still slightly hungry when she had finished.

Five-grain porridge, with toasted coconut flakes, lychee and mango combo, blueberries, acai, cacao nibs and almond milk ($14)

I ordered the buttermilk Tim Tam Pancakes, with poached Nashi’s (pear), mascarpone chocolate soup and crispies and Tim Tam gelato.

All I can say is that this dish is VERY rich, so if you aren’t into sweet breakfasts or into rich foods, then I suggest you look for something else. But if you love Tim Tams or are a fan of pancakes then this is definitely the dish for you!!

First of all, this dish was also plated beautifully. I loved how the purple flowers looked against the white plate and the chocolate sauce. The purple flowers definitely added that extra pop of colour, which the dish needed.

I thought that the pancakes were fantastic! They were slightly crunchy on the outside, while the inside was light and fluffy. I was given three pancakes, which I thought was very generous seeing as there was already so much on the plate. They were also very generous with the chocolate sauce, covering each pancake along with chunks of Tim Tams. You never felt as if you’d run out of sauce before you reached your last pancake.

I thought that the Tim Tam gelato was great and was a perfect addition to the dish. It definitely tasted like Tim Tams and not just regular chocolate ice cream. Finally the addition of the poached Nashi was fantastic! It helped to break up the sweetness of all the other elements.

I honestly enjoyed my meal and thought that the idea of using Tim Tams was fantastic! I would definitely eat this again, but next time I might share it with someone, as it was just a bit too rich.


Buttermilk Tim Tam pancakes, with poached Nashi’s (pear), mascarpone chocolate soup and crispies and Tim Tam gelato ($17)



Long Story Short has quite a large floor space within their café. They have a large number of tables spread throughout the café. It feels quite spacious and you don’t feel as if you are too close to other tables. Long Story Short has beautiful windows along the one side of the café, which lets all the natural light in. There is nothing I love more than natural light in a café, and Long Story Short definitely does this quite well.

I love the furniture within Long Story Short, as I think the light wooden tables and the white chairs look clean and make the café feel even bigger.

Unfortunately there are no tables outside (well there weren’t any outside when I was there), so if you want to bring your dog, this might not be the place to go.

The staff members at Long Story Short were all very friendly and we felt quite welcomed when we walked in. We were asked a number of times if everything was ok and if they could get us something else.

Overall, both Beth and I enjoyed this café and would come again. We also thought that all the items on the menu were reasonably priced and were quite similar to other cafés we’d been to in the past.



Address: 40 Crockford St, Port Melbourne, Melbourne, (Vic)

Map: here

Phone: (03) 9646 5697

Facebook: here

Website: here

Operating Hours: 

Monday –Friday  –7:00 am- 3:00 pm                               

Saturday –Sunday – 8:00 am – 4:00 pm

Stagger Lee's Info
There is a very small step going into the cafe


Have you visited Long Story Short before? Tell me what you thought of it. Do you have any suggestions of cafe’s to visit?

Comment down below, I’m always looking for somewhere new to try.

Until next time,

Happy eating



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